UPDATED: Lily Tomlin testifies re telecom immunity

The Senate Select Committee on Intelligencewas called into session over the holiday weekend to hear testimony from telecom expert Lily Tomlin. Chairman Rockefeller and Vice Chairman Bond were particularly anxious that her testimony be in the record, before a bill on telecom immunity comes up for a vote in Congress. Because Ms. Tomlin took the Fifth, her testimony was taken from a LP phonograph record and from tapes of old television programs.

"Here at the Phone Company we handle eighty-four billion calls a year. Serving everyone from presidents and kings to scum of the earth. (snort)

She goes on:

We realize that every so often you can't get an operator, for no apparent reason your phone goes out of order [snatches plug out of switchboard], or perhaps you get charged for a call you didn't make. We don't care. Watch this [bangs on a switch panel like a cheap piano] just lost Peoria. (snort) You see, this phone system consists of a multibillion-dollar matrix of space-age technology that is so sophisticated, even we can't handle it. But that's your problem, isn't it ? Next time you complain about your phone service, why don't you try using two Dixie cups with a string. We don't care. We don't have to. (snort) We're the Phone Company!" --   --Lily Tomlin from "Saturday Night Live: The First 20 Years" (1994 Cader Company).

But perhaps the most telling testimony came from Lily's first comedy album "This Is A Recording" (Polydor, 1971). This was a truly shocking revelation of the arrogance and lawlessness of the telecoms:

in a conversation with writer Gore Vidal as Ernestine says "Mr. Veedle, you owe us a balance of $23.64. When may we expect payment? Pardon? When what freezes over? I don't see why you're kicking up such a ruckus when according to our files your present bank balance, plus stocks, securities, and other holdings, amounts to exactly ... Pardon? Privileged information? Oh! (snort, snort) Mr. Veedle, that's so cute! No, no, no, you're dealing with the telephone company. We are not subject to city, state, or federal legislation. We are omnipotent."

UPDATED: Link to disturbing video, below in Jim P's comments.